Heyhey people! English time!!
どうもどうも赤髭です、英語です

"I can't believe

I didn't (do this) sooner..." - When you did
something too late that could have helped you. - もっと早く（すれば）良かった時に

Aさん：What's up Bさん？
Aさん：お、Bさん、最近どうしてる？
Bさん：Not much Aさん, I just got these new airpods though, I can't believe
I didn't get them sooner
Bさん：まぁね。。あ、最近あれ買ったよ！エアポッド。もっと早めに買えばよかったよ。
Aさん：Ah alright, they're pretty useful, but they're expensive and it
looks like bird p**p is dripping out of your ears
Aさん：そっか、便利よね。でもさ。。値段が高くて耳から鳥のウ〇チが漏れてるように見えるから。。
Bさん：....thanks(Sarcasm)
Bさん：。。。。ど～お～も～ありがとう（皮肉マックス！！）
Aさん：You're welcome
Aさん：いえいえ
Bさん：I'm gonna go get a refund...
Bさん：さぁ。。返金しに行こうか。。。